Thoughts on Timing and More Kids.

We always figured we would wait til Ellie was at least 2 before we started talking about having another kid. Of course, these discussions were back when Ellie was hypothetical and we had all the time in the world.
The reality, we're getting older (maybe not me, but definitely Steve!) and with how long it took to conceive Ellie we just don't have the luxury of time on our side anymore. So it's a discussion we go back and forth on (especially after that false positive around Ellie's 6 months). There are a few things we know.

1. We sure as hell aren't ready now. Remember sleep? I need some of that before we even consider doing this again.
2. Steve will be 35 this year.
3. We always said we wanted to be done by the time Steve turns 40, and now he's saying pregnant by 39 (eye roll) 
4. My fertility probably definitely still sucks 

But at the same time we are ahead a bit from last time too. We know a lot more going into it. We're more prepared for a longer journey. And we have Ellie so I feel more chill about whether or not it happens (ask me again when we are trying tho). 

Originally we thought 2. Then we thought a year. Now we are leaning on 18 months. The reality of it is, time will pass whether we want it to or not but I want to enjoy Ellie too. I want her to be an age where she's a little more independent and maybe, we can think about buying a house in between and all that stuff. 

Plus we have to consider, I'll likely have another high risk pregnancy and c-section. and I'd really hate to do the NICU again but we could make it work. 

The official timeline now is nothing til she's 18 months and then it's kid 2 or Steve turns 39 40 and then he plans on getting the big snip and that's the end of it. 

Ellie is growing up faster than I care to admit and part of me thinks she'd be a great big sister one day and then the rest of me cries at the idea of her being big enough to be a big sister. My sweet girl.